Random Thoughts

He is the first person I think about every morning. I can't count the number of times he runs through my mind on a daily basis. I wonder what he is doing right now. I wonder if he is smiling. I wonder if he is thinking about me. .. missing me.. wanting me... half as much as I desire him. I wait for a sign.. . something/anything that signals he is thinking about me as much as I am him.

Nothing.

The mind races... are you in this alone? Is he just not that into you?

No way. He loves me. He said so...

This is silly.

But, I love him anyway

Love his intelligence.. he sparks my interest ... who would have thought..
Love his masculinity... most times. I need him to understand that showing love does not emasculate him. It is okay to make a person a part of your life. It does not make you weak.
Love his sex. I feel like he whispers 'I love you' with each stroke.
I love the way I feel when I'm with him... at peace.. smiling inside.

But fack!!

Sometimes.. I have doubts. Sometimes I just need him to say it is going to be alright. Sometimes I need something.

Yesterday, I told him we should just be friends...

My heart hurts.
Love is many things.
One thing it is not is confused.
When you love someone, you love him/her... screw ego, pride, masculinity, female independence crap.. u go after what you want.. right?

Guess not...

...

"If you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with.

You are falling in love with my insecurities, and my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me. You are falling in love with my immaturity, my constant need to feel loved and appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession, my tendency to be too clingy. You fall in love with my troubled past, and my hopes and dreams, and how I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me, you fall in love with my self-hate and all my imperfections and my perception that nobody could ever love me.

But, you are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when I’m with you, the way I’ll text you in the mornings just telling you I hope you have a great day. You’re falling in love with the occasionally humorous and/or thought-provoking things I say, and the way I blush when people ask me about you. But to me, the most important thing will be that you are falling in love with me, despite my thinking that it is impossible."

Unknown (via kidlovesdoodles) (via mymydinh) (via geraldinee) (via mariahhsayss) (via justmichelle) (via rachelthinkswhaat) (via timirose) (via inspyrred) (via omfgmaryanne) (via mobiniana) (via evienahguarts) (via soundinmylungs) (via psily) (via thestoryofagirl-) (via hystericbeating) (via xwayshefeels) (via summertongues) (via photomoto) (via eletheowl)

D - Day

I will never loose my hair again! About time I did it!